No. The answer is “No, they’re not”. Also, we’re all but 100% certain that this product is a joke of some kind.

A purported company called Vaev is claiming to sell other people’s used tissues for $80, the purpose being so stupid that A.) it has to be a joke and, B.) you really need to read their own description on their website:

"Prepare for flu season and feeling clear all year round with the Væv Tissue. The Væv Tissue is specially treated with organic ingredients, is non-prescription, and works hand in hand with the human body to keep your immune system feeling like your immune system."

The idea is vaguely, stupidly like the early vaccinations of the 18th century in which doctors would experiment by taking a swab of some 18th century-ish disease like cowpox and introducing the swab to a healthy person (usually a child) in the hopes that their immune system would step up to the plate and make them resistant against the full disease. This is, of course, a very rudimentary explanation of immunology which has been improved upon and made many times safer over the past two centuries.

To be clear: all medical experts in the field agree that vaccination is, with very, very rare exception, extremely safe and effective. The flu vaccine is less effective than, say, the polio vaccine becaue the influenza virus mutates from year to year but doctors still agree it is better to get it than not.

Also, the same percentage (100) of doctors would agree that this method is really dumb. Here’s the video. Below it, I’ll tell you the exact moment when I became convinced that this is meant as a joke.

Did you realize it was a prank at the same point in the video that I did? It was at the :20 second mark when the model opens the expensive-looking faux-marble box and pulls out a bunch of wadded up tissues underneath a petri dish!! HaHa! Nice one, whoever put this together. I hear Gwyneth has already put in a call asking for a licensing agreement through Goop.

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