Contact Us

Trump is About to Pardon a Turkey — We Lay Odds on How He Will ‘F’ It Up

National Thanksgiving Turkey Presented To Media Ahead Of Wednesday's White House Pardon
Getty Images

The dopey tradition of the President pardoning a turkey goes back many decades and has been an “official” duty since 1989. Today (in about 15 minutes as I’m writing this), Donald Trump will give his first presidential pardon to a turkey (not counting Joe Arapio).

Turkey-pardoning is one of those traditions that nobody can screw up. So, how will Donald Trump find a way to screw it up? Here are our current odds.

(Remember, I’m writing this in the past. So if I nail this, just remember that I called it BEFORE the Great Cluster-Gobble-F**k of 2017 or whatever history books will call it.)

  • 7-1 that Trump will reverse all of Barack Obama’s previous turkey pardons.
  • 1-1 odds that after the Turkey doesn’t sufficiently praise him for his pardon, Trump will criticize the turkey on Twitter and send Jared out with an ax.
  • 3-1 that he will use it to attack either one of his predecessors or Hillary.
  • 5-1 that the turkey will attack him like the bald eagle did that time he tried to do a “patriotic” photo shoot.

Subscribe to 96.5 KNRX on

God, that funny! It’s almost as if the eagle, as our national bird, has the innate ability to smell out a Russian plant.

Oh, boy! Just five minutes until the pardoning begins! I sincerely hope Trump doesn’t botch this turkey pardoning. After all, it’s just a matter of time until some turkey (probably Pence) will have pardon Trump.

Best of 96.5 The Rock

Recommended For You

Best Of The Web

Leave a Comment

It appears that you already have an account created within our VIP network of sites on . To keep your personal information safe, we need to verify that it's really you. To activate your account, please confirm your password. When you have confirmed your password, you will be able to log in through Facebook on both sites.

Forgot your password?

*Please note that your prizes and activities will not be shared between programs within our VIP network.

It appears that you already have an account on this site associated with . To connect your existing account just click on the account activation button below. You will maintain your existing VIP profile. After you do this, you will be able to always log in to using your original account information.

*Please note that your prizes and activities will not be shared between programs within our VIP network.

Please fill out the information below to help us provide you a better experience.

(Forgot your password?)

Not a member? Sign up here

Sign up for The Rock VIP Club quickly by connecting your Facebook account. It's just as secure and no password to remember!

Sign up to have exclusive The Rock VIP Club contests, events, coupons, presales, and much more delivered to you for FREE.