Hi, Internet! I'm Buzz Adams and I've been the host of the Morning Show for a long time. When I started, OJ was a beloved former athlete, Bruce Jenner was the epitome of masculinity and Donald Trump was a laughable ass-clown. The point is, some things change but other things don't so much. One thing that hasn't changed are my hobbies. My hobbies today are the same as they were all those years ago. Here they are, starting at number one. SLEEPING: It's the one thing I really look forward to. I'll wake up from a four hour nap and immediately start fantasizing about turning in for the night. I've really elevated sleeping to an art form. WATCHING TV: There are a few show I like but, really, I'm just watching to help me fall asleep. TAKING SLEEPING PILLS AND THEN ORDERING STUFF ONLINE : This is really fun and you should try it. I pop a couple Lunesta, wash it down with some purple drank, then, a few days later, stuff shows up for me in the mail. The best part? I have NO IDEA what it's going to be when I open it! It's like getting a Christmas present from someone who knows exactly the kind of stuff you like but who has no concept of "restraint" or "good judgement." I got some really awesome beard oil from ETSY the other day. And I don't currently have a beard! I am presently single, if I haven't tipped my hand already. I'll totally understand if you swipe left on this bio.
A Modest Columbus Day Proposal — Replace It With ‘A-Holes Day’
Anybody who was admired for anything in the past was probably kind of an A-hole by modern standards. And they should have their own day.
El Paso Man Convicted of Two DWI Deaths Starts GoFundMe Page
Ohhhhh....it's just not fair, is it? First you get kicked out of the Army and NOW you don't get to keep all the money you earn for yourself. Times is hard.
Buzz’s Favorite Tom Petty Covers
There's nothing better than hearing Tom Petty come on the jukebox when you're sitting in a bar and all they've been playing all night long is garbage.
Mister Rogers’ Timeless Advice in the Age of Mass Murder
Las Vegas native Jimmy Kimmel began his show Monday night by showing the clip at the bottom of this post.
Hollywood Reporter — Celebs Should ‘Shut Up and Count Their Blessings’
"Why do actors think we care about their political views?" " Who do these football players think they are?" "Just shut up and sing!"
Perspective: History is Kinder to Athletes Who Protest than People at the Time
There have been incidents in the past, long before Colin Kaepernick, where sports fans have been just as outraged.
The DadBag — You Can Get a Fanny Pack That Looks Like a Hairy Belly
Remember, it's not just a carry-all. It's the most effective form of male birth-control ever invented.
Police Looking for ‘The Mad Pooper’ in Colorado — Yeah, It’s Exactly What You Think It Is
"I was like, Are you really taking a poop right here in front of my kids? And she was like 'Yeah, sorry".
What Three Items Could You Buy Together to Make a Cashier Freak Out?
Can you name three items that would cause the cashier to freak out? Only three. No more, no less. Here's what I came up with:
‘Slaves for Sale’ Sign Upsets Missouri Neighborhood
It must be tough being called a racist. Imagine being labeled with a such a hateful term just because it's true.